I’ve written screenplays for all kinds of reasons. For love. For money. I’ve written them as favors. I’ve written them in order to get attention from […]

Back before The War Department was The War Department, she worked those long tedious hours as a production dog. First as an assistant to the producer, followed by working in commercials as a production assistant and an assistant production coordinator.

So here’s the scene. It was a Saturday backyard birthday party and barbeque for a friend’s ten-year-old. The winter afternoon was crisp enough for sweaters. I’d […]

Ring ring. “Hi. It’s Doug Richardson. You’ve reached my voicemail. Please leave a message.” Beep. “Hi, Doug. It’s Susie from credits over at the Writer’s Guild. […]

“Just calm the fuck down,” said Arnold Rifkin in his usual, bulldog tone. Rifkin was the producer for the picture we’d planned to make based on […]

We’d battled and beat MGM’s lousy, last-minute notes. And after four months in a bunch of unnecessary language lessons at UCLA, Japanese scare-master Hideo Nakata had […]

“I talked to my agents,” said director Hideo Nakata over the telephone. “And I talked to the studio. And I told them if they fire you […]

Hideo Nakata wasn’t returning my call. This was a first. After more than a year of working together, developing and prepping the filmed version of my […]

This one’s about a kind of evolution. To be more acute, it’s about my own twisting journey. From a puppy writer to who I am today […]

I don’t hold grudges. Really, I don’t. They’re an enormous waste of energy and emotion. But just because I don’t hang onto them, doesn’t mean they […]

Picture this. I’m on the fourteenth floor of a Century City high-rise, anxiously rocking in place before a bank of elevators, hoping to hell the lift […]

It’d been a disastrous pitch meeting at Paramount. The director, Señor Brit, had somehow decided the most important element of the presentation was for him to […]

I’ve told this story before. But not in this forum. And I remind myself of it from time to time when I start getting precious about […]

Showbiz is a blood sport where nearly everybody keeps score. As some people play it, you’re only as good as your last box office gross or […]

With the express intent of busting out of my oh-so-comfortable action-thriller box, I’d concocted and sold this career-shifting pitch to Paramount. It was a tear-jerker of […]

“I’ve got good news… and bad news,” said producer Mark Gordon over the telephone. With Mark by my side, I’d sold my pitch for a prison […]

While in the midst of a publicity tour for my second novel, True Believers (available today as an e-book), I was scheduled for a radio interview […]

A few years ago, a studio executive invited me to pitch a TV idea to producer David Zucker, president of television for Scott Free, Ridley and […]

With the Friday delivery date looming, I wrapped up the pilot draft on Thursday and prepared to distribute the script to my producing partners at Scott […]

So it was upon catching Skyfall that I thought it the appropriate time to share this true Hollywood tale of lust. My best pal Robert and […]

I can recall only three times in my life when I’ve felt weak in the knees. One was on my wedding day. I’d made my walk […]

I’ve nothing against directors. The men and women who make magic with movie cameras have much to offer the civilized world. Skill, talent, vision. Some have […]

A few nights back I was having dinner with some new friends when I was reminded of this story. I was describing a conversation I’d had […]

I’ve written about theft before. Both stories and ideas nicked by scumbag producers without consequence. What follows is an epic tale. All true. With multiple endings […]

So here I am. Looking at a trade announcement trumpeting a multi-million dollar deal for Mr. Celebrity Screenwriter’s three-and-a-half page treatment that, based on the one-line […]

The perps had been nailed red-handed. One of whom had mistakenly faxed me a transcript of an audio recording that featured me pitching my legal thriller. […]

Let’s review. The story for my legal thriller was stolen and resold for millions. The producing thieves had been caught. I’d negotiated a hard but wisely […]

Having written posts for THE SH**TIEST SCRIPT EVER WRITTEN and THE WORST NOTE… EVER, I thought it was about time that I told of this far […]

I get this call about once a year. It could be from a family member or a friend or a former colleague. But it usually involves […]

So here’s the scene. It was a twisted bit of drama. The young psychotic played by the brilliant Ben Foster had lashed the nubile, object of […]

Can’t even tell you how many times I’ve been asked something like this: “So how does it work? Somebody gives you the idea or do you […]

In these few hours since learning of Tony Scott’s leap off the Vincent Thomas Bridge, I’ve been flooded with memories of the man. Most of which […]

Strange I haven’t written about this before. Especially considering how often I’m asked about breaking into the biz. It’s a constant question. How did you do […]

  I don’t talk too much about Welcome to Mooseport. Not so much because it was a box office failure. On second thought, maybe so, because […]

  Ever heard of a film called Billy Jack? I’m sure some of you have. Meanwhile, the rest of you are asking Billy Who? As it […]

This is one of my favorite tales. I’ve told it many times. At social occasions, I’m often asked by those who’ve already heard the story to […]

It’s out there. From my screenplays and novels to my hundred and forty character Twitter sorties to this very blog. Whatever I say. Whatever I write, […]

I’d only just arrived in Miami. After checking into my junior suite at the historic Biltmore Hotel, I made the quick walk over to the Bad […]

I’d just finished my first novel. I had over one hundred thousand words, typed, proofed, and printed on some five hundred pages of loose leaf paper. […]

It’s said that hindsight is 20/20. Not sure about that as an absolute. This one still eats at me. I’d just wrapped Bad Boys on which […]

You might think me strange when I say this. But I kind of dig jury duty. I don’t know what it’s like in your zip code, […]

In this particular post, I need to keep the names under wraps because some of the following are still “A” players. So for now, I’ll just […]

“Found you,” said the movie star. “How’d you get this number?” was the most witty thing I could summon. On the other end of the telephone […]

I adore movie geeks. You know those guys. They’re the fan boys who, when not hooked up to their Xboxes and PlayStations or planning a two-week […]

I’m a big Michael Douglas fan. Have been since I was a boy and he was playing Karl Malden’s sidekick in The Streets of San Francisco. […]

  *Warning. The following blog, though accurate and intended as comical, absurdist entertainment, uses offensive language and depicts crude behavior. Click BACK now or hold your […]

  On one of my early career assignments, I became acquainted with an older, gregarious producer who, by my count, had made nearly twenty movies without […]